If my man is going away for 10 days is it selfish to not want him to go?
I am going to miss him so much!!!

And what's worse is he's sick so he's really grumpy =(
I'm sick too but he's turned into this thing where he says "mine's worse than yours" like he doesnt care that I'm feeling like hell.

Grr.

T.

Right B I'm challenging your initials!

T. is being far too over protective in some ways.
TM&TM were suspicious that I was pregnant or sick or something.
Made me laugh.
I like that he is protective.

C(L) is a dickhead.
He obviously can't get over B. so he is abusing you in the hope you will care and go running to him.
DON'T DO IT.

My shoulder is sore.
Choir is going well but the CD is awful.

C(A) keeps txting me.
He wants me back etc blahblah blaaaah.

This is for L. Whatever happened to G's tyres????

Goodbye all xox

DEATH

He died.
MY GOD HE FUCKING DIED!
I wasn't/am not in love with him but I did love him.
Like a brother except not a brother caz thats pretty screwed up.
It's not fair.
His family are so lovely and he is/was an absolutely amazing guy.

I hate saying he "was". It's soo.... FINAL.
Like BAM you're dead and now you once were.
Like saying your hair was cool.
your friend was alive.
Get my drift?

Death sucks.

Love you forever.

My Tuesday.

R.I.P Isaac and Tori.
I miss you Ice.
I don't know what else to say.

Ok... So not bedtime yet.
When I said "Dream Well" to the world in my last post it reminded me of my nightmares.
And I figure if I tell you about them they might stop. Maybe.

Sooo. For about a month or so I've been having night mares. Some repeat. I have had four different ones.

The first nightmare: My sister went missing. While I was babysitting.
I had to explain to my parents that my boyfriend "distracted me" and it was awkward.
Especially seeing as my sister had disappeared. I woke up at 3 am.

The second nightmare: My boyfriend was drowning and the water had made a sort of glad wrap-like barrier between him and I so I couldn't save him. I woke up shaking, the blankets soaked in sweat and all over the floor at 4 am.

The third nightmare: My big finale in a show and as I bow my clothes disappear and all of my ex boyfriends are in the front row. I wake up at 2 am sitting upright.

The fourth nightmare: I'm having sex with the sleaziest guy I know. And it's not scary IN the nightmare. But at 5 am when I wake up I fell like vomiting and shooting myself for even dreaming it. Gross.

I had fun. We shopped aaaaaall day.
I spent 200 dollars 8-O
but all in all a good day.

He came. He enjoyed himself =)

And I saw HIM. My ex.
AWKWARD.
He didn't see me though.
He was drunk last night, said a few strange things...
Soooo i didn't say hello. Just walked on by.

You know when you get that feeling where you just know something will happen?
And even though it's a huge lifechanging thing that can't be undone, you want it to happen?
Oooh I have that feeling.
You see I have discovered that I am fully in love. Forever. With one person.
And he said it today. He said the name.
It made me so happy inside. I know it's going to happen.
It feels soooo right! I just wish we were 18. or 19. Yes. 19.

Gaaah I hate being 17. There's no significance. I'm old enough to have sex but that passed a year ago. BUT I'm not legal to buy alcohol. Just legal to be a slut while I'm sober I guess.
Yeah, the government didn't think that one through!!!
Stupid politicians. It's like the anti-smacking law.
BUT that's a whole other story for another blog ;-)

Goodnight World.
Dream well =)

Bitch

Don't u hate it when all your friends are in different social groups and just because they don;t all get along they assume you bitch to your other friends about them?
ALL of my friends do this.
I don't backstab. If I have a problem I tell them.
But nooooo that's not good enough for you.
i'm the gossiper apparently.
I always bitch to you if I have to. Never to her cause I know she doesn't care.

SEX!
I just felt like saying that.

S=Seduction
E=Erection
X=X rated orgasms.

mmmm

Sorry for rubbing it in Brit.
Man I'm bored.

Dooo doo.
Oooh. Is Emily the same Emily that my very close friend with the orgasmic car liked?
Good girl.
He can be a wanker.

Ooo Matty babes is online.
And my hair is blonde! Yay. I wish my camera was charged but noooooooo My sistter took my batteries.
Disgusted at her rudeness, she didn't even ask.

McKenzie... Why did we never know each other properly? I love your blogs.

My eyes are kinda droopy...
Hope to c u in my dreams!
xo

=(

She didn't come.
But you did. That made me smile.
But now you don't touch me or kiss me or tell me that you love me.
That is all I want.
Is it that much to ask?
I give you everything I have and still I can't get those 3 small things?

Blegh

I cant find my Ipod touch =(
I'm stressing sooo much!!!
And i haven't seen you in too long.
You better sort them out before I go insane.

I'm bored.....
I'm waiting for pork to cook. I swear it's worse than watching paint dry.

Txt me... or something.

Don't ya just love when the superfit ex head boy asks u out?
Pfffft stop trying so hard lol.
I'm over the whole sexual relationship shit that your looking for.
He is a better bf than u. Get over it.
Not to mention you live in Dunedin.
I'm happy with my relationship.

Ugh I have operatic tonight. Its way too hot.

Loving your Tommy Gun comments Brit lol.

LAUREN!!! I totally saw u.. You look good.

ZAchy... Ill c u on Saturday? I promise I wont forget this week lol.

I need my camera... I'm going to go find it xD

xo

YES!

YES I love you!
YES I trust you
YES yes fucking YES.

I love you so much I am willing to give you my whole literal heart in your bare hands because I believe as long as you love me it will keep beating even without my body attached.
Yes, I will move in with you next year.
Yes, I will stay with you for ever.
Yes Yes Yes.

That night I felt like as long as we stayed in that one spot, nothing could ever hurt me.
Noone else would ever matter.
I could be asked to sing for the Queen and I still would've stayed with you in that one spot.
I didn't care about your parents watching, I didn't care about your brothers giggles or your neighbours driving by. You were mine, I didn't care about what they thought.

Your hugs are magic
Your kisses are my drug
Your love is my air
You are my everything.

I Love you.
Yes, I do.

I miss him =(
I've seen you 4 times in the last month. Anything I should know?
*Sigh*
I understand illness but the day that every single other friend of yours starts getting first in line for you I have to start wondering.

Brit got the internet back =D
Yay.

Zach your hair is sooooo short!!!

Aaaah it's been so long since I was last on here.
I had to do a 20 minute survey for Research NZ last night. Man it was long.
I had to laugh, the survey was about Maori language and the woman could barely speak English let alone Maori. She was lovely though =) She kept apologising for her accent.

Someone write a good blog. I need something to entertain me seeing as I'm being deprived of my boyfriend.
I have to go to the dental nurse now =(
bye
xo

This week

Well I've been back at school almost a week and I must say I'm rather enjoying it.


Well... The classes are better anyway.





But boy do I miss you.


I only see you every 3rd or 4th day now.


But I suppose . . . it could make us stronger.



She's a slutty mutty bitch.

I hate her. How dare she accuse me of cheating on him.

Stupid ugly mole. At least I have a boyfriend who doesn't use his mates for cash.
prick!

Heya Zachy lol.

OMG the theatre looks soooo cool!!!!
I'm actually up working on stuff for it atm.
Sooo tired....

Well I'm owties.
L8a

She's a crazy bitch.

Can you please move or something?
Cause my tiny car isn't capable of fitting through that massive 20 meter space with my shit driving.
Actually I'm just being a bitchy slut cause thats what i'm best at.

Grrr she annoys me so much the stupid fuckin mutt should be given a dildo and a sock.
The dildo to stop her contracting more STIs and to stop her cheating on her bfs and a sock to put in her huge mouth..

There's my daily bitch session over.

OMG Phil's moving.
New World is going to die!
And school starts tomorrow.
Now I'm going to die.

I love my job, my boss is pretty much the best!

I miss my friends. And my boyfriend.
I haven't seen much of him lately =[

Gaaah my feet are cold.
Zach hurry up and blog so I have something to read!

I'm talking to a Fijian. He's so nice.
He listens to me.

theres nothing on tv
i might sleep.
goodnyt xo

Love love love....
I'm in Love...
And I'm very bored.

Ya know when you go to bed early thinking you're doing a great thing for yourself by doing just that?
But then you can't sleep when you get into bed?
That is what sadly happened to me this evening =[

-I braided your hair tonight
I'm sorry it didnt work
You should come get me tomorrow and we can sort things out.
It was awkward tonight.
I don't want it to be -

-I need to step back.
dependence isn't usually my thing.
I'm sorry you noticed.
I'll stop -

-Brittany Jane come online right now!
You suck-

-You arent a virgin anymore my wee girl!!
sorry i'm never home.
i'll call you sometime-

OMG guess what?
Gingernuts are yummy =]
So is Brittany who is currently offline for once when I'm missing her most!
Silly girl.

Tears shouldn't be repeated

Love is a strange thing.

One minute, you are forever.

Then some retard goes and makes up b.s to try make your relationship get majorly f***ed up.

Hmm.



You know who you are. He loves me. I love him. YOU LOVE HER SO GET THE F*** OVER IT!!!



Tim.

I'm sorry.

I know you aren't at fault and I know I went ott.

I love you.

Please forgive me.



Sam.

Thank you to you and Holly for being the greatest friends today =]



Kerry.

I'ma gunna kill you!!!



*breathes deeply*



Long hugs after a fight fix everything =]



Especially in the rain.



Sorry for waking you. But thank you for waking.
I promise I'll try harder.
I love you too much to even think about losing you.
I tried thinking about it tonight and embarrassingly broke down in front of Kerry and Sam.
Sorry guys.

Looooop.

/\/\/\/\/\/\ loooOOOP!

hehehe Brittany.

I miss you.

I also am hating school already!!!

I had my interview today and already I'm wishing to leave. Haven't even started yet.

Italics.

italic bold!!!

bolds without italics.

Doobeedoobeedoobeedoobee doobeedoobee doo (breath)
Doobeedoobeedoobeedoobeedoo
Doodoo.

Girls suck.

Oooooh guess what?!

Naaa I just said that, I have no interesting life.

I got invited out tonight to go driving.
BUT! I have school tomorrow...
ugh. blegh.

I'll stop boring you now =)

I'm new to this

I am unsure of my purpose of being here

But I will improve
*makes note to self*